Ashley Madison guy has now sent me a picture and he is not as hot as the imaginary guy in my head. I am thinking that he is an old looking 34, or maybe a 40 year old liar.
It occurs to me, however, that perhaps this makes me both shallow and whorish. It also occurs to me that it is perhaps not a problem. After all, this is my fantasy life and emotional vacation and if I say no fatties, no baldies, no oldies then that is certainly my prerogative.
Interesting side issue: now that I have agreed to meet for a drink how do I get out of it...I refuse to wind up in a situation where I am meeting other people's needs to avoid hurting feelings. That would be an old pattern - one I am not interested in repeating.
I have to value myself enough to operate on my own terms and only for myself.
It is not like this is real life anyway, it is pretend life and I get to both make and break the rules...
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Katrina
It is refreshing to read that other people are going through what I experienced – but from the other side.
So you are now shallow and whorish, but aren’t we all? Don’t we all want to slip into another reality without the baggage of our current circumstances?
Isn’t that why we look back on our youth – our ability to recreate our personality with each new school year or job - trying new experiences, no responsibilities?
I too have longed to re-claim my own person, to take control of my surroundings, to re-take ownership of my life and live on my terms.
As I read your posts I want to know if the on-line “Ashley Madison guy” is as fulfilling as the young buck last spring? Can a cyber relationship compare with a physical one?
I have looked to reclaim my own happiness through physical adventures, and know that feeling when the other person calls it off before you are ready to end it, but can a cyber relationship provide the same escape as the physical one?
Hel
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